5 things that actually help when you’re having a bad time

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Sometimes I just feel like nothing is going as I planned.  I make plans, I do my best and in the end there’s that one thing that ruins everything.  It’s not always like that…well, mostly.  So when something is clearly wrong, I already start building my defense because I know what will happen – a huge depression.  Good for me that I am not a kind of person who lay in bed with a huge box of chocolate, ice creams and with you tube on, for months…I spend just a day this way and then I get up and take an action because I always remember that no one can save us but ourselves. 

But! Even if it’s just one day, you how to survive somehow, and it’d be really good if you could help your mental -self at the same time.  Because you have to be strong to be able to get up and fight. And to be strong you have to do your homework,  feel what took you down in the first place and think about your problem.  Ask yourself 3 simple questions.

1.Why it happened?

2.How it effects my life?

3.What can I do to help it?

When you are asking yourself those questions, what comes to your mind first?  Those are the answers. 

So just from my own experience, and I went through a lot, there’s a couple of things that really help when you are down.  Here’s what I do :

  1. Bed & Breakfast.  If you feel horrible and you just want to be alone under your favorite warm blanket crying like a baby, let yourself do that.  You have to let go of all the feelings bottled up inside you.  Stay in your comfy bed but first prepare some good food.  Something health and something sweet.  Today every meal has a dessert.  You don’t have to do anything, just let yourself be as you are, weak and tired.  After some good meal you will feel better. I like to eat ice creams straight from the box, it helps me somehow.
  2. Music & Movies.  Everyone has a list of sad songs that brings the tears, for me the best of all are the old ones but not only.  I like Evanescence,  Coldplay,  “all I want”by Kodaline or” eyes shut “by Years &Years and more. About the movies, ” Dance with me “, “Walk to remember”  or “Titanic” are my classic favourites.  You have to cry watching it, you just have to! So say hello to YouTube and start crying, you will feel better.
  3. Laugh.  Seriously, I don’t know why but when you’re depressed, even the smallest, most stupid and unfunny things can make you laugh and somehow it makes you feel good.  I love watching funny things, like everyone, but when I feel bad I always meet up with best guys of this world.  Jimmy Fallon, Conan, The late late show with James,  Russell Brand or Ellen – funniest girl ever. When I watch them I feel like it doesn’t matter, I mean my problem.  They give me a positive energy, they make me laugh and before I notice I already feel stronger. Try it.
  4. Goals.  I always do some list whenever I’m sad. Make yours! Don’t be foolish, it’s just for today, while you are full of that energy like “screw it!  I am strong, life is amazing and I can do anything!”  kind of attitude.  Let’s be honest, you won’t be like that tomorrow, you’ll be fine but not like this.  But make your list anyway because it brings hope, strength and joy.
  5. Social media.  Tumblr, instagram and blogs /vlogs. My second family. When I’m sad I like to make myself even more sad because I feel like it’s a chance for me to let go of all emotions that I’ve been collecting through a month.  So I read sad quotes, tragic stories, someone else’s stories.  I bring myself down, I clean every corner of my soul.
  6. I do things that I don’t do daily.  I suddenly want to learn whole choreography from some MV, I want to bake, learn Chinese… I have a lot of ideas, it looks like depression brings best ideas, or the one that you were too scared to admit that you have!  Anyway, do whatever comes to your mind.

Those are just my ideas, things I do every single time when I feel that sadness is coming or already here.  It seriously helps me.  But you also have to add something yours, and be aware.  In my case it lasts a day and I’m ready to start again, my batteries are full. I have optimistic soul, I’ve been always like that,  I’m a fighter, but everyone is different so if you see that it lasts too long, try to ask for advice.  Go talk with your friends, family. Remember that all those things are helpful but their job is to bring your feelings out but any of those won’t solve your problems, you have to do this.  Ask yourself questions from above and see what will happen. Good luck 🍀

As always please let me know where did I make a mistake in this post and remember that it’s just my personal opinion, you don’t have to agree with any of the words I wrote.

BunnyKat

My daily goals+how I motivate myself

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A year ago, I was the most hardworking and spontaneous person in the whole country, and my country is not that small!  Now I’m lazy, weak and I don’t have energy to do anything.  Because of that I am also frustrated, cause it’s not who I am.  Not doing anything makes me feel tired and sad and I feel like in a trap.  I can’t just lay on the couch watching stupid movies for hours and yet, here I am doing just that. In my case it started last year, in June when I had leg surgery and I couldn’t move for almost two months.  It was then that I’ve gave up my daily workouts, healthy diet and my passions and all I was doing back then was watching MTV.  I was a sport freak since I was 4 so you can imagine how I felt when the doctor “trapped” me in my bed for such long time.  It also turned out that the surgery went well but unfortunately  my contusion haven’t got any better. I was so depressed and angry that I didn’t care about anything and it took me a year to pull myself together but I couldn’t get back on track with my previous lifestyle.  I got used to junk food and sweeties, I haven’t worked out since then and every time I say “I will work out today!” something came out and I give up training, same with languages.  I love learning new languages, it’s my biggest passion and my future dream job but recently I can’t focus and I am bored after 5 minutes of sitting.  What I discovered is that it’s not because those are not my dreams anymore or interests.  I still truly love it but I feel like I am physically healthy but my soul, mind and spirit, well, they’re still lying in a bed.  I’ve read that it often happens to people who were on a diet.  They lost pounds but in their heads nothing changed.  So today I decided to finally do something to bring back the real me.  Here’s how I’m gonna do it, but first I need to make a list of the things I want to achieve.

  1. Workout.  It’s the most important thing on my daily to do list so it really frustrate me when I can’t make it happen. What I know for sure is that if I won’t do it early in the morning, I won’t do it at all.  I have to workout immediately after waking up and before breakfast. It gives me energy and strength for the rest of the day.
  2. Healthy diet.  I feel like this is the hardest thing to overcome.  It’s so easy to get use to sweet or junkie food so of course it’s better to prevent when it’s not too late but I know from my own experience that we only see the problem when it’s already done. But in my case it’s not about gaining weight because I don’t gain weight no matter what, but instead my stomach suffers from too much sugar or fat so what motivates me the most is the pain I feel.
  3. Foreign languages.  I want to be a translator so I have to study hard to achieve it.  Besides,  this is my true passion so it’s more like a relax than work. But after not doing anything for months it’s hard to find your spirit again.  I was so bored and lazy and now I want to overcome this but believe me, from all bad habits this is the worst.  I also know that I have to do it because this is a kind of thing that I have to do on my own, no one can do it for me.
  4. Blog.  This is literally the first thing that actually isn’t hard to do.  I usually post 2 a week and I am quite motivated.  But I know that I have to be careful because there is always that moment when you have a crisis and you are loosing your motivation and ideas so it’s super important to watch out and catch that moment cause if you won’t do this you will wake up thinking about quitting your blog and going on some short hiatus.  We all know that hiatus never ends.
  5. The rest.  For me it means work, housework, my dog, books, music, going out, friends and family and more. I like reading and listening to music, I also have to play with my dog because it calms me but I want to meet people too.  It all takes time during the day.  How can I think about going out with friends or family when I can’t even finish my work or make myself to workout or cleaning the house.

Those are the things I would like to do every single day.  It’s not much when you’re organized.  I could do it all till afternoon and have a free rest of the day. The key to success is to find a way to start doing it the moment after I wake up.  Easy to say but am I able to do it?  Well, I found a few tips that may be helpful.  Let’s see.

  1. Phone. It’s important to not look at the phone too often and spend more time outside. We hear that every single day while watching television or listening to radio. But this time forget about it and grab your phone. In this case phone is your best friend for many reasons.  The most important?  Apps. Download any apps you like and don’t look at your free space. As long as it will help you stay motivated and focused, you can have it.  So find something for yourself, workout app, positive quotes,  daily journal, anything!  The 2nd thing is your alarm, so be sure your phone is charged and signal sound loud.  You can even record your own like “hey, it’s time for a glass of water /piano lesson/workout. Get your ass from the couch and do it now!!” And the last thing, your camera.  Take a picture of everything you did.  You have just finished hard workout?  Take a photo of your sweat and tears!  You eat healthy?  Create a photo album of your meals, just remember that it’s easier to stick to your plans when you see the results.
  2. Journal.  Buy yourself a beautiful journal and start writing.  Become a real journalist or just start creating a memory base.  I don’t feel like writing a diary, I prefer to keep it simple and short. I shared my notes on few sections,  food, exercising, learning… and I started to summarize my every day.  It soon will become my habit.  Every time I open my journal I feel proud of myself and happy because I see how much I already did. It’s motivating.  Just try.
  3. Find a goal for your goal.  People work better when they have a chance to win some price.  Everyone knows that.  Same goes with fear.  When you know that your deadline is close you pull yourself together and work harder, faster.  That’s how human works.  So use it now to make your dreams come true.  You want to learn Italian? Fine,  book yourself a trip and pay for it now,  or pay for some course in language school. You have no idea how hard you can work when you’re under the pressure. “I paid so much, I can’t lose my money!”  “My trip is next month, I have to do this!”  Try yourself.
  4. Buy a gift.  For yourself of course!  Buy something really amazing and ask someone who you can trust to take it. This is simple.  Your friend can give it to you only when you achieve your goal (pass the language exam, get a driver license and so on) It must be someone who won’t give up under your pressure and pleads.  Want it? Take it!
  5. Punishment.  Pick the cruelest punishment you can and tell your friends and family about it.  Promise them that if you won’t have a driver license in 3 months, you will go on the beach… for nudist!  Naked!  Or something else, the point is that people are cruel and if they have a chance to humiliate you, they will do it! Don’t want to suffer?  Start fighting.

I did all of those ideas and I feel like I am really motivated… and scared!  I want to surprise myself and people who are waiting to see my naked butt. I really feel like this time I will make it!  Just do your own list of dreams and goals and then find some tools to make this journey easier.  You can use some of my ideas or all.  Everyone is different so it may and it may not works in your case but it’s always worth trying.  I believe that when you put some effort in preparations, it’s just more difficult to let go.  It’s always a shame to lose your money, dignity or pride…

What are your goals?  What’s on your to do list?  Let me know and please, as always, let me know if you find any mistake in this post.  Thanks

BunnyKat xoxo

5 apps I love and use every day

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Talking about apps, do you know… No, the right question is Can you believe that until last month I was using my old phone which didn’t have colors and had 10 years?  Seriously, right now I’m having the time of my tech life because I have just bought my first smartphone…aand I still don’t know how to use most of the things.  I have got Sony Xperia e4,because I decided to start from something not too expensive but good enough to be able to install some of the latest hits like pokemon go or instagram, but I don’t have neither so far. But let’s go back to the topic.  I installed a hundred of most popular apps and then reinstalled all of them and again and again and again, until I decided to think instead of clicking “install” everytime I see the button.  And I did. I don’t have much space on my phone so I have to be careful and think twice until I decide to go for it so I always ask myself two questions :

Do I really need /want it? 

Have I got space for that on my phone?

If one of the answers is yes then I usually test chosen apps and decide if I want to keep any of installed.  Today I want to present my 5 favourite. I seriously can’t imagine my day without these and honestly, they improved every aspect of my life.  

  1. Daily workouts.  I’m a sport freak so I have to workout every day, and I like to of course.  But if you’re like me and you prefer to workout at home, in privacy, you probably know that feeling when it’s a middle of the year and you’ve just finished the program that you’ve been doing for the last few months and you are sooo bored. You have seen every single workout video on YouTube and you pray to all those fitness gurus “please, share some new video so I can make my butt bigger and my tummy flatter because I’m sick of the old boring routines that don’t work because my body got used to it and don’t even sweat anymore”…or something like that. Well, I’ve been there and because of that I started to look for some simple but nice app and I found Daily workouts. You can choose from many options like app for arms, belly, legs,stretching….  I wanted everything in one app and there actually is option like that. And it’s only about 2 minutes of installation and 30MB of my precious space.  Brilliant.
  2. Duolingo.  With this app you can learn every possible language, maybe not every but most of the existed.  I’m learning korean,  spanish and japanese.  You can’t depend only on Duolingo but it’s the best tool for beginners. I can honestly say that it’s nice, simple and what’s most important, it motivates you to work harder.  I think it’s because of that owl. Hi
  3. Candy camera.  Best app ever! Now my awful photos look so stunning and professional, I’m like a pro my friends. Hundreds of photo effects, cute stickers and more.  Easy to use and doesn’t take much space.  Perfect.
  4. Get shit done! It doesn’t sound friendly but it will help you.  If you’re lazy and you want to improve your life and be able to finally say “each task of my to do list -completed” then install Gsd.  You have to name the thing you want to do  “workout / cooking /homework”, set the time you want to spend doing it and that’s all. It’s a really helpful app.
  5. Funny quotes free.  It’s a Huge base of funny quotes, updated every day. Hilarious sentences and pictures. I just love it.  You will too.

Ok, now you know what’s inside my phone.  Basically I try to surrender myself with things that I love but also need, so I try my best to behave and not throw myself on every single app;) something to learn, something funny and something helpful in a daily life.  I suggest you to do the same.  For me all those apps work just great and I really see the progress like I’m more productive, focused, motivated.  But this is just my personal opinion so it may not work for you.  My advice?  First check how many space you have, then think about what would you like to support /improve in your life and what do you like to do. Find out if there’s any helpful app for you and test it.  It’s not like you can’t remove it, right?

As always, please let me know if you see any mistakes in this post. Thanks

BunnyKat xoxo

How to /not/ get a job

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When you really need /want a job and you finally have that interview , you plan.  Everything, from the shoes or blouse you will be wearing, to the things you will add to your CV to make it looks more attractive, ending on some weird, scary or unbelievable scenarios that you are creating in your head. You just think about it all the time. Because it’s important.  Your life depends on it, literally, cause no matter what we all have to pay the bills and eat.  This is basically like a casting.  You have to show the best of you, impress the person in front of you and make it feel like no one suits for this job better than YOU.  But what if something goes wrong?  When you realize that you shouldn’t have said what you’ve just said, or you are speechless after hearing some question you didn’t expect to hear,  or you just feel that no matter what you do it’s not going to work because the person in charge doesn’t seem to like you. This happens to people around the world all the time, and it’s terrible when you know that it has to be good but at the same time you can see it’s far from that.  Well, I’ve been there, and I will tell you exactly what went reeeally wrong in my case.

I made a few fundamental decisions in my life, finally, it took me awfully long months, but I did it.  I decided to finally take my language skills to the highest level, last level, because I knew for a long time that I truly can speak and write and I understand English, but until now I just didn’t have a chance to use the language.  It’s like with the recipe.  You’ve read that so many times and you’ve seen people cooking it in so many different ways, hell, you even eat it!  And you know, you just know, that you can cook it but there’s no place where you can get the ingredients.  So one day you decide to go to that fancy market, expensive and huge, just to get the ingredients.  And you are scared because you have never been there and you don’t know how it’s in there or how to get there even, but you also feel that you have to try, find out if you are really that good, otherwise you will stay like that forever. I am like that now. I make a lot of mistakes and there’s so many things I have to work on but I know that I can’t do more here, if I want to achieve it, became fluent in English, I have to throw myself into the language and it only means that I have to move abroad. So I started to looking for a job and a place to stay.  I don’t have much money and I don’t want to go super far because it’s my first trip abroad for so long. So I found a few jobs that interested me, wrote a CV, I scanned my references and sent it to like 30 potentially interested people, surprisingly  almost everyone responded. I picked 3 favourite and decided to set up the interviews.  As I was looking for a job abroad it was obvious that all interviews has to take place on Skype.  But not everything went as planned or at least good…

The main information you need to know is that I applied for a nanny /babysitter position, because I worked as one some time ago and I am experienced, have references and I really like kids .

After I registered on the site with job offerts for nannies/care assistants , I started to receive messages from people who were interested in my profile.  There were so many people who needed someone to take care of themselves or their family members. I picked 5 which seems best for me and I sent them a message that I’m interested.  We have a few email talks and after a couple of days only 3 of them left. We decided that it’s time to take it to the next level -Skype time! And so we did.  And here the story about my terrible performance begins.

The first one was a family with two kids,  10yrs old boy and a baby girl. I logged on Skype and called the family.  On the other side of the monitor was a boy and his mom.  I saw them perfectly, they didn’t see me at all but it was the connection’s fault so they didn’t mind. And so we talked, but it was like a question-answer-question-answer kind of talk. We clearly didn’t matched up. But they were nice, funny and normal so I was hoping to get along with them, until the mom asked a simple question.  A question no one expects anymore, the one that I haven’t heard for years, well, only in movies!

“Why I should pick you?”

I was dumbfounded.  Speechless. I couldn’t say a word, I had no freaking idea of what to say or do.  The silence was killing me and lasts for literally 2 minutes. They looked at me waiting and I said the only thing that came to my mind, “Well, what can I say, you just have to try…” Our conversation ended a minute after that and they haven’t called me back ever again…And I agree with them!

The second interview was better but I wasn’t prepare properly. I mean, I had a great Cv, I tried to look good and friendly (leave your lipstick in your bathroom)  and I even learned a few difficult but professional words to sound more… well, professional. But this case was different.  It was an older man who has a lot of disabilities and he needed someone to help him with a daily care.  He wrote that it doesn’t have to be someone experienced because his former assistant can teach everything so I applied.  Then we had a phone talk.  Together with his assistant they asked me one question.

“Do you have any questions for us?”

I said no because the truth is I didn’t.  I read all files he sent me before, I read his profile a thousand times, I even read everything I found in the Internet about people like him so I had all the theory already in my mind.  They quickly ended the conversation promising to call me back.  It never happened and I really wanted this job so I decided to not give up this time, I sent them a message asking what happened and I added a bit of my angry and bad mood but I just couldn’t help it. I also explained my point of view and wrote that it is just not right and if they don’t want me it’s ok, I understand and am not angry or anything but they should be honest and tell me that directly. What I found out was that they have not answered because it was weird for them that I didn’t ask them anything.  But surprisingly, after my not so friendly email, after 3 days of silence they asked me if I can talk to them once more.  They gave me a second chance.

While I was waiting for the answer from the first family and then the older man, I had my last interview.  A young woman with one baby boy.  We talked on Skype and this time I decided to not try.  Don’t get me wrong, I really wanted this job but I discovered that no matter what you have in your cv, what will you say or how much you will try to look professional, in the end it’s the chemistry that matters.  You just have to like that person, have a good feeling about the job, be able to imagine yourself working for that person.  So I was just myself, I was honest, calm and guess what!  For the first time in my life, I was actually laughing during the interview!  And she offered me a job.

So I have a few simple tips and advices for you, all inspired by my own, latest experiences.

  1. Be prepare.  We are usually too lazy, we take everything for granted, we think that impressive CV will get us a job.  No. YOU will be talking, you will have to make a good impression and you will be answering all the questions so make a research before the interview.  Why you want this job?  Why you’re best?  Why this industry?  Remember that you don’t know the person in front of you. Maybe it’s someone curious, maybe lazy and maybe it’s someone friendly?  Who knows?!  Be prepared for each kind of questions, especially those you think are too simple to be asked.
  2. Be curious.  People like people who are interested, curious and friendly.  So ask as many questions as you can,  because it makes you look like you care.  Sometimes you really are stuffed with all informations and you feel proud of yourself because you did a good research but even then don’t say “I don’t have any questions”  to your possible future boss.  They won’t think that you are prepared and know everything, no, they will think that you don’t care and you don’t give a damn about the details
  3. Don’t pretend.  Be yourself. Don’t try to look professional, calm or cool.  In the end your false nature will come out because you can’t pretend forever but you have to work with the person who hired you so be yourself, be kind and someone will appreciate you one day. People see when someone is natural.
  4. Be brave.  Even if you don’t suit the job but you really want to try and gain some experience, apply.  Go for it as you are.  Tell everything what’s inside you, tell the truth and who knows, you may and you may not be lucky.  We all started somewhere and of course some people don’t care but a lot of people still remember how it is and they’re ready to give you a chance. Also, remember that you may really want or need a job but it doesn’t mean that someone has a right to not respect you.  If you feel like your interview is not fair, someone is pushing the line or you feel that someone is not treating you right, react!  You can have many jobs but you have one dignity and you need to respect yourself.
  5. The last but not least.  Find a job not a money factory. I know we live in a hard time where money rules the world but your job is really important.  Your job helps you live, takes a half of your life and keeps you occupied for a couple of hours each day.  Find a job for you, a place where you can find yourself, where you can feel satisfied, happy, something what can makes you feel calm, grateful and thankful.  You know you found a good job when you don’t call your job “a job”  but a passion.  It’s easy to say but not everyone is so lucky.  That’s what you thought right?  But do you know why some people have a dream jobs?  Because they were patient, brave and passionat enough to not give up.  They never gave up, even while working in the supermarket they remembered about their dream and every evening they do one small thing to make this dream come true.

As always, please, if you see some mistakes in this post let me know! I hope this post was helpful and you will get the job of your dreams.

BunnyKat xoxo

Horror time! What scares you the most?

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Horror time!  Yes, it’s a kind of movie genre that we all are scared of but at the same time we all like to prepare some snacks, invite friends and make a movie night marathon.

To be honest, I am not really sure if I don’t like horrors because usually they are just weak and pointless or because I am really scared.  The Fact is that I am not one of those who spend the whole week sleeping with their parents or looking over their shoulder because they’re so scared of the movie they’ve watched.

But I can’t pretend, it all depends on what kind of movie we are talking about. I will show you my list, my top 5 of the worst horrors ever.

5. Monsters.  I think we all agree.  Who is scared while watching the predator or other movie with a monster as a main character.  It’s only funny because let’s be honest,  you can see the mask from the mile and usually those monsters have a weird unnatural voices and it only makes them more fake. So no, you won’t scare me that easy,  not with the help of a monster.

4. Ghosts.  No again.  Sorry but I love ghosts no matter how invisible or ugly they are.  I should thank dear Casper,  my favorite cartoon of my childhood.  Besides,  I believe in ghosts, yeah you read me good,  so a ghost story is always a good story,  definitely not scary. 

3. Murderer.  It’s more tempting but it all depends.  You are so wrong if you think that I will run to my neighbours after seeing a guy wearing black hoodie behind my window.  That’s just not me and don’t get me wrong, I am not brave enough,  I’m just reckless.  But!  Some psychopath with a knife,  telling me his story of a brokenhearted teenager who needs to get his revenge or else he won’t find his peace?  Yeah,  I’m already holding a phone…sitting in my closet…

2. Unexplained something.  Yeah,  you know that kind of horror movies. There’s some house or some other creepy place,  some objects and people and basically nobody knows what is the hell going on and who is doing all those nuts but people are dying, blood is everywhere and something is hidden in every corner.  The movie is over and we still have no bloody idea of what was that, was it a ghost?  A person?  Hell knows!

1. Children.  The worst thing you can do is to pick a movie with a bunch of childrens inside!  Their eyes, their uncoordinated moves and all those creepy scenes when they are calling their moms… I need a therapist.  Remember that kid from Omen? Don’t do this to yourself, just don’t. 

One more extra bonus.

A horror including some religious beliefs like the Devils,  hell or exorcisms.  I haven’t added it to my list because I personally think that those movies should be prohibited. It’s unlegal,  against humanity,  wrong!  I saw it once and I seriously still am scared as hell and I still feel like I am dying every time I think about it!  I even can’t stay at home alone when it’s dark and stormy.  No,  get the hell out of my list!

This is my list,  my opinion and this is what I am scared of.  I know people who watch only horrors and they say it’s a pleasure. But I’m not one of them.  I don’t like it,  don’t watch it,  sorry. And you?  Do you have guts to admit that you are scared of.. What?

BunnyKat xoxo

Ghost writer is alive

You thought the writer is dead?  Yeah, so did I.  But! The ghost writer is me or I am a ghost writer, whatever, and I am totally fine.  I remember my beginnings, so many names, platforms and ideas, posts, and somewhere in the middle I’ve lost my energy, passion and enthusiasm for writing.  Now, when I’m more lost and bored and confused than I’ve ever been, I decided to give it a try, it’s a blind shot and I have no idea where or when it will leads me or end but why not to let it be, just like that.  So here it is, here I am, sharing my ordinary life with you, my ups and downs.  Enjoy, I will! 🐰

BunnyKat